Things To Know Before You Say “I Do!” (4)by Pastor Faith Oyedepo, Week 5, October, 2008

Dear Reader,

Sexual purity before marriage is the foundation to trust in marriage. The Bible says in Hebrews 13:4 that Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled. Marriage is only honourable when the bed is undefiled. Once the marriage bed is defiled, that marriage has lost its honour. This Week, I will be teaching on The Marriage Bed.

Another thing to know before you say “I do”, is that you must know that what you do with the bed during courtship or before marriage, amounts to laying a foundation for what your marriage will be like, when you get into it. The law of sowing and reaping still holds here. This is why God’s Word says: Whilst the earth remaineth, seed time and harvest shall not cease (Genesis 8:22). Since the earth is still remaining, whatever a man sows, he will reap.

When the bed is defiled, the seed is sown and you can be sure that it will produce fruit and when harvest time comes, it will manifest. Before you go into marriage, you must tell yourself that your marriage bed must be kept pure, otherwise, the honour in marriage can never be attained.

If you are not married, whether you are in courtship or not, there is no room for sexual relationships or anything that leads to it. Somebody says, “But we intend to marry.” As long as you are not yet married, it is sinful for you to go into it or do anything that leads to it. The reason why a good number of couples get involved in pre-marital sex, is heavy pettings that got out of control. Many who found themselves in it had no intention of having sexual intercourse, but one thing led to another. This is like the child who stood at the edge of a forest fire and says, “But I only lit a match.” That is why the Word of God says we should abstain from all APPEARANCES of evil (I Thessalonians 5:22).

You don’t need to wait until evil comes before you flee. It starts from kisses to passionate pettings and before you know what is happening, the bed is defiled. By so doing, the seed of bitterness and problems for your future home are sown. Don’t let anyone lure you into defiling your marriage bed. It is dangerous; don’t engage yourself in it. Beware!

Some people have found themselves pregnant with babies they were not prepared for. For some individuals, the guilt feelings become barriers to adjustment in marriage. It is like a wound, even when a wound is healed, the scar is left behind. That is why care has to be taken, so that when you begin in the spirit, you do not switch over to the flesh. The only way out is to keep walking in the spirit, for when you walk in the spirit, you shall not fulfill the lusts of the flesh. God’s Word says: This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.

Even if one of the partners is being tempted, the other should be able to help him overcome the temptation. It takes two to defile the bed. Daniel purposed in his heart not to defile himself (and this was under the old covenant), and he was not defiled. But we are operating under a better covenant based on better promises and it should be easier for us today to overcome, than it was in the days of Daniel.

Purpose in your heart not to defile yourself and you will not be defiled. You earn yourself respect from your partner, when you marry as a virgin. Sin is deceitful; it looks sweet initially, but bites at last. Let your relationship before marriage be a holy one and that which will bring glory to God and honour to you. This is easy as you learn to walk in the spirit.

To walk in the spirit begins with new birth. This comes by surrendering your life to Christ. You surrender by confessing your sins and accepting Jesus as your Saviour and Lord. If you are ready for this, please say this prayer: Dear Lord, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me my sins. Cleanse me with Your precious Blood. I accept You as my Lord and Savious. Thank You Jesus for saving me! Now, I know I am born again.

Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through:

E-mail: faithdavid@yahoo.com Tel. No: 234-1-7747546-8;

For more insight, these books authored by Pastor Faith Oyedepo are available at the Dominion Book Stores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian book stores:

- Marriage Covenant

- Making Marriage Work

- Building a Successful Family

- Single With A Difference

- Success in Marriage (Co-Authored with Bishop David Oyedepo).